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Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis (R) said Tuesday that he would sign legislation to make this summer a “Freedom Summer” in the Sunshine State. Of course, that doesn’t apply to pregnant women, who, as of today, are subject to one of the most draconian abortion bans in the country.
The legislation is great news for anybody who does not have an unwanted pregnancy and wants to buy snorkeling equipment (up to $25) in July. The Freedom Month Sales Tax means that lots of recreational items are discounted in Florida that month.
Speaking of recreational, if you are a woman who had recreational sex that left you pregnant, you better find out quickly… because abortions after six weeks of pregnancy are now illegal in this paddle board (up to $300) tax haven.
But the good news doesn’t stop there for non-pregnant Floridians. Thanks to DeSantis’s largesse, they can visit Florida’s state parks for free on Memorial Day weekend.
Of course, if you ended up getting pregnant after being raped by your uncle and didn’t file a police report, you might want to spend that time trying to figure out where you can get an abortion. Just FYI, don’t look in the South.
Because, while the six-week abortion ban includes an exception for pregnancies (up to 15 weeks) resulting from rape, incest, or sex trafficking, you must have documentation to verify this fact. So, if you are a 14-year-old middle schooler who didn’t file that police report because you were worried that Uncle Lou would beat you to a pulp if you didn’t keep quiet, you are out of luck after six weeks.
On the plus side, inflatable water tubes and floats up to $150 will be cheaper for you so that you can really enjoy the summer.
DeSantis hailed this legislative milestone by taking a swipe at the Biden administration.
“Florida is stepping up to make summer more affordable for families,” he said. “While the federal government is causing high inflation and skyrocketing costs for families, Florida’s smart fiscal policies allow us to reduce taxes and help reduce the burden on Floridians.”
Not the burden of an unwanted pregnancy, though. If that’s your problem and not the high prices of sunscreen (up to $15), flashlights (up to $30), and bicycle helmets (up to $50), then you need to look elsewhere.
“I encourage all of Florida’s residents and visitors to take advantage of these extra savings and discover the unique experiences the real Florida has to offer,” said Department of Environmental Protection Secretary Shawn Hamilton.
As of today, these experiences do not include access to safe abortions after 42 days following a sexual encounter, i.e., a point in time before many women even realize that they are pregnant. At least not unless their life is on the line.
However, they don’t have to be concerned about the sales tax on concert tickets through December 31, which will be waived. That should be welcome news for any woman now having to pay for two.
